Name: Kassy
Age: TWENTY-ONE!
Topic: Our Purpose.
So yeah. As of May 27th, I am now 21 years old. Not a really big thing really. Just another birthday. But still. I had a birthday. And it kind of feels weird to be "legal." Haha. I just decided that I wanted to ramble a little about my birthday. It wasn't huge. I didn't do a lot. But still, it was my birthday. Haha.
Back on topic. We were all born for a purpose. That's right. You weren't just an accident, you weren't a mistake. Well, okay, so maybe you were an accident. But you were an accident for a reason. I was an accident. But it doesn't mean I don't have a purpose. It doesn't mean that my purpose has changed just because I was born out of wedlock in an unexpected manner. As actually, most of us are. But yes my dear readers. We were all born for a purpose.
I have really been loving the song, "The Anthem" by Jake Hamilton. There is this one line that just gets me every single time. "I am royalty. I have destiny. I have been set free. I'm gonna shape history!" Yes yes. I am going Christian again. And yes Miss Tiffany if you are reading this, my blog is very Christian. You want to know why?! Because I want it to be. Or really, I actually don't mean for it to be. It just is. Because it's who I am. It's what my life is.
My life isn't mine. It's God's. I don't live for me anymore. I live for my Papa God. Because he is amazing and I would not be here, I would not be who I am, I don't even know if I would be alive, if it weren't for him. That's right. I am darn proud of my faith. Not saying that people who don't shout it off their rooftops aren't proud of their faith, this is just who I am. Loud and in your face. Yup.
So again, off of my ramblings. Purposes. We have a purpose. What's your purpose? I have NO clue. You know who knows? Papa. He knows. Because he knows everything about you. Oh yeah. Everything. All the details. Freaky right? Not really. Because once you know he knows that. You have nothing to hide from him. Because you can't really. But that isn't even the point. The point is. Papa.
My purpose. Is to live for God. To worship him in my life. To have a worshipping lifestyle. I worship him through music and song. I worship him through my photography. [And that...is a whole other subject...which I talked about a little bit...but there is SO much more.]
We are a generation of change. [No I am not talking about Obama people...yeah...not even touching that subject...lol...people and their anti-christ theories...anyway.] We are in a generation of the most abortions, the most pain, the most depression, the most...almost everything. But we were born for a purpose. We are a generation that is on fire for God. Everything that Satan puts up against us...God brings back a hundred fold. Which I personally find SO very beautiful. Because God is always FOR us.
Honestly, I don't even know what I am getting at right now. I feel like rambling on and on about how amazing you are. Yeah, that's right. You! Whoever you are. Reading this. YOU ARE AMAZING! You are fearfully and wonderfully made! You are beautiful...or handsome in the case of a man...unless you don't mind being called beautiful. I can not even explain to you how much that your Papa God loves you. He FIERCLY loves you. He passionately, fiercly, and deeply loves you. Agape. Unconditional. 1 Corinthians 13. Replace Love for God. Because God is Love.
So yeah. I am just on a kick where I want everyone to know how wonderful they are. Because I have just been realizing how wonderful I am. And I am not even saying that in a conceited way. It's just how Papa sees me. And he sees you the same way.
Well, I just wanted you to know. I know this is random. And I don't even know what else to say. So I am going to end my ramblings right now.
God Bless.
Saturday, May 29, 2010
Sunday, May 16, 2010
Taking Chances On Dreams.
Name: Kassy
Age: 20
Purpose: To write.
So, there is nothing really particular on my mind right now. But dreams. I have some of the craziest dreams ever. Not like, I am sleeping and dreaming, kind of dreams. But the kind that you just think up. Like, oh, my dream is to be a singer. I want to be a firefighter. Or a police officer. Lately, I have realized that I am a big ol' dreamer.
Too many people these days lose sight of their dreams. When you are little, it is so easy to have a big dream. But then people and reality crush them. I always see little girls who just want to be princess'. But then someone tells them, "Oh honey. You aren't really a princess." Then you see the gleam in their eyes diminish. Because all they really wanted to be...was a princess. Or little boys who want to be super heros. Who run around in their capes and just want to save the world, because that is just what super heros do. But then they are told, "There is no such thing as a super hero! Grow UP! Be a man. Not a child." And that little sparkle. The one that you love to see, oh so much, is gone. And it makes me sad.
People dream. And those dreams are what created this country in the first place. Those dreams are what created everything that we have right now. Someone thought that they can do it. So they did. And to take that away from children is down right horrible. Yes, in reality there aren't really super heros. And in reality there aren't very many "real" princess'. But do you really want to see that sparkle go away. The one where it shows their hearts desires. That love in their eyes. The one that says, "HEY! I just want to know that I am important!" Everyone deserves to have a dream. Even if reality says that it just will never happen. Everyone deserves it. To have that desire. To have the sparkle in their eye. And I just love to dream.
I think I should be an entrepreneur. Or something. I have so many thoughts. So many crazy ideas. And they make me happy. To just think of it on the spot. To have this crazy dream to open my own shop and be creative. To maybe one day design my own wedding dress. To sing in front of an audience on a big stage. I have LOTS of dreams. And yes there are SO jumbled in my mind that I don't even know where to go with them. But it's SO much fun to think about. One of my favorite things to dream about is weddings, due to a friend of mine getting married soon.
I want to design my own dress. I want my colors to be dark purple and a light lime green. I want everything to be simple but elegant and maybe a little bit of modern vintage thrown in somewhere. I see myself in a beautiful hillside with a gorgeous backdrop and a cross behind us. With everyone important around me. You look one side and you see my family and friends, you look on the other side and you see my fiances family and his friends. And then just the pure love in our eyes when we say "I do." Then you go to the reception. Where everything will be translated beautifully. All of the namecards will be on cupcakes in a jar. And there will be this 2 maybe 3 layer cake as the wedding cake. We will have our first dance on a wooden dancefloor under the stars to the song, "Beloved" by Tenth Avenue North. And everything will be perfect. Simple, elegant, and beautiful. It's my dream.
Or really, A dream. I have too many to count. And I think that everyone should dream. Everyone should take chances on their dreams. Because the moment you lose sight of your dreams. The moment you lose that sparkle. Is the moment that you lose yourself. Because it's your heart. Your dreams are in your heart. Your dreams come from your heart. And I just wish that everyone could just keep their dreams.
Keep that childlike quality to yourself. Because it keeps you alive. Be an adult, but be a child at heart.
Me personally. I love being a kid. I love Disney. And I love coloring in coloring books. I love bubble wands and playing outside. I love to play tether ball. And I love to just play with dogs. I love to sing silly songs and worship in the woods. I love staring at the stars and getting my breath taken away by the awesome expanse of beauty laid out before me. I love, love, and everything that love comes with. I love exploring God's creation and being astounded.
I love being a child. Because it helps me appreciate things more. To see things in a way that most don't see. And it's a shame because we all deserve to be able to do that. Don't let anyone take your youth away from you by saying, "Grow up! You need to see reality and what it is." The reality is, that you can still be an adult and make grown-up decisions and have a childs heart. It's probably one of the most beautiful things ever. The innocence in children. It makes me happy.
God Bless.
Age: 20
Purpose: To write.
So, there is nothing really particular on my mind right now. But dreams. I have some of the craziest dreams ever. Not like, I am sleeping and dreaming, kind of dreams. But the kind that you just think up. Like, oh, my dream is to be a singer. I want to be a firefighter. Or a police officer. Lately, I have realized that I am a big ol' dreamer.
Too many people these days lose sight of their dreams. When you are little, it is so easy to have a big dream. But then people and reality crush them. I always see little girls who just want to be princess'. But then someone tells them, "Oh honey. You aren't really a princess." Then you see the gleam in their eyes diminish. Because all they really wanted to be...was a princess. Or little boys who want to be super heros. Who run around in their capes and just want to save the world, because that is just what super heros do. But then they are told, "There is no such thing as a super hero! Grow UP! Be a man. Not a child." And that little sparkle. The one that you love to see, oh so much, is gone. And it makes me sad.
People dream. And those dreams are what created this country in the first place. Those dreams are what created everything that we have right now. Someone thought that they can do it. So they did. And to take that away from children is down right horrible. Yes, in reality there aren't really super heros. And in reality there aren't very many "real" princess'. But do you really want to see that sparkle go away. The one where it shows their hearts desires. That love in their eyes. The one that says, "HEY! I just want to know that I am important!" Everyone deserves to have a dream. Even if reality says that it just will never happen. Everyone deserves it. To have that desire. To have the sparkle in their eye. And I just love to dream.
I think I should be an entrepreneur. Or something. I have so many thoughts. So many crazy ideas. And they make me happy. To just think of it on the spot. To have this crazy dream to open my own shop and be creative. To maybe one day design my own wedding dress. To sing in front of an audience on a big stage. I have LOTS of dreams. And yes there are SO jumbled in my mind that I don't even know where to go with them. But it's SO much fun to think about. One of my favorite things to dream about is weddings, due to a friend of mine getting married soon.
I want to design my own dress. I want my colors to be dark purple and a light lime green. I want everything to be simple but elegant and maybe a little bit of modern vintage thrown in somewhere. I see myself in a beautiful hillside with a gorgeous backdrop and a cross behind us. With everyone important around me. You look one side and you see my family and friends, you look on the other side and you see my fiances family and his friends. And then just the pure love in our eyes when we say "I do." Then you go to the reception. Where everything will be translated beautifully. All of the namecards will be on cupcakes in a jar. And there will be this 2 maybe 3 layer cake as the wedding cake. We will have our first dance on a wooden dancefloor under the stars to the song, "Beloved" by Tenth Avenue North. And everything will be perfect. Simple, elegant, and beautiful. It's my dream.
Or really, A dream. I have too many to count. And I think that everyone should dream. Everyone should take chances on their dreams. Because the moment you lose sight of your dreams. The moment you lose that sparkle. Is the moment that you lose yourself. Because it's your heart. Your dreams are in your heart. Your dreams come from your heart. And I just wish that everyone could just keep their dreams.
Keep that childlike quality to yourself. Because it keeps you alive. Be an adult, but be a child at heart.
Me personally. I love being a kid. I love Disney. And I love coloring in coloring books. I love bubble wands and playing outside. I love to play tether ball. And I love to just play with dogs. I love to sing silly songs and worship in the woods. I love staring at the stars and getting my breath taken away by the awesome expanse of beauty laid out before me. I love, love, and everything that love comes with. I love exploring God's creation and being astounded.
I love being a child. Because it helps me appreciate things more. To see things in a way that most don't see. And it's a shame because we all deserve to be able to do that. Don't let anyone take your youth away from you by saying, "Grow up! You need to see reality and what it is." The reality is, that you can still be an adult and make grown-up decisions and have a childs heart. It's probably one of the most beautiful things ever. The innocence in children. It makes me happy.
God Bless.
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
Family And Beliefs.
Name: Kassy
Age: 20
Purpose: To Vent?
Family. You love them. You leave them. You dislike them at moments. But they are always there. My family. Is CRAZY. That's right. Totally an completely insane. In a good way. However there is something that makes it hard for me to be a part of my family sometimes.
Beliefs. Oh, and faith.
Yes. I am going there.
I want to go to a school that could change my life forever. BUT, and this is a big BUT. My family doesn't think it's a good idea. Namely my mom, dad and older sister. Why? Because of their beliefs and their thoughts patterns. So right now. I am going to vent my frustrations about my family on my blog. Because I have to get it out. I tried but I feel like I need to write it fully and completely out.
My mom is a believer of God and believes that Christ died for our sins and is our savior. She believes that God can heal but has a religious spirit and fear working against her when it comes to me wanting to go to BSSM. She is also very much influenced by what people write about places that are complete and total lies. She went on Google and searched the school. And things that were written about it were less then impressive. Because people always have opinions and people don't understand the power of the Holy Spirit. So they call it a cult. And then she misread what the website said about the school thinking that it said that they give you powers. When they really help you grow in your faith and learn about the gifts that God has given you. And that is the religious thought. That it's a cult. When in reality it's the real, true, power of the Holy Spirit working. Satan doesn't like that. So things get said, and things get written and it's all a bunch of pooey. And then she has fear working through her. She doesn't want me to go because it is too far away and that she will never be able to see me. Total fear. But I need to grow. And take a step into the unknown.
My dad believes in God, and has had experiences where Jesus has literally saved him. But he also believes in reincarnation and different kinds of things from different religions. And he is influenced by my mom so whatever she thinks, he thinks. Because you know, they are married. And I guess you should agree on some things. But it would be nice if someone was on my side. Bleh. I love my dad, but sometimes...I don't know.
My older sister believes in God but doesn't believe that Jesus is our savior. Which was one of the hardest things for me to ever hear. Because I just couldn't imagine. And we have talked about it. And I have tried to argue. Which didn't get anywhere at all. And all that jazz. But she is also influenced by my mom so she doesn't want me to go either. She read the website and also misread it. Telling me that no school can give you powers, and that God is the only one who can give you gifts. Which I totally agree with but that isn't what the school is saying. And I love my older sister. But I don't know how to get across to her, but to just love. She told me she will never change her beliefs because she knows that it's the right thing. Which I respect her for. But I just worry.
And my younger sister is a teenager. And as a teenager she might believe in God and Jesus, but she won't say it because she wants to be cool. And according to teen law....if you are a Christian, you aren't cool. So she doesn't like me talking about God to her or around her because she likes her life and doesn't want to be convicted of her sins. So she puts me down about my faith saying I am acting all "holier then thou". When I am just trying to be a better me.
Then there is my grandma. I love her. And she believes in most everything I believe in but when someone tells her something she kind of gets swayed. SO when she hears negative things about what I am doing or what the youth group is doing or the school I want to go to. She thinks. And over thinks. And then maybe gets a negative mindset about it too. Even if it is all a lie. She tries not to take sides. But she doesn't want to step on anyones toes. And some day she will have to choose a side and not sit on the fence. Not that she needs to choose sides as in be on my side or theirs. But she has to know where she stands in her faith. Either all in or not in at all.
So there it is. My family. Their beliefs.
And my beliefs? I believe in my Papa God. And Jesus. And the Holy Spirit. And holy drunkenness. I believe in the baptism of fire and water. As in, the baptism of the Holy Spirit and water baptism. I believe that the lifestyle in the book of Acts in the Bible is the lifestyle we are supposed to live. Be proactive. Go and do. Not just sit and talk. And though I know that I am totally not the perfect Kingdom Citizen, I am doing what I can to better myself. And I just love God. I am head over heels in love with God. He is my provider and my father. He loves me with no contraints and treats me like a princess. He sets me up for sunsets to see and capture on camera. He does that for me. He calls me beautiful and lovely and his darling. And I love it. And my entire life, is no longer mine. It's not. I don't live for me. I live for God. And that's that.
So it's hard to be a part of a family that has different thoughts. Do I love them any less? No. Not one little bit. Because I do love them. I pray that they will come to the realization that life is more then what they think and that there is a God that is the God of all gods, the Lord of all lords who has the world in his hand. Who sent his son to die for our sins and to show us the lifestyle we are meant to live. I know it sounds like I was being kind of harsh about my family, it's just. Part of me doesn't know what to do. And the other part of me wants to just slap them in the face and tell them I am not stupid. I am not naiive about my Papa God. I am naiive about a lot of things. But when it comes to my relationship with God, I have learned to be wise. I am learning daily more and more about my Papa. And whatever he wants in my life I want.
So this is just me venting. It doesn't happen that often that I need to vent like this. But it had to happen eventually. I love my family. They mean the world to me. They are beautiful and loving people. Hilarious and silly. I don't know where I would be without my family. They have taught me so much. This one thing. However big it may be....has made it hard to be around them sometimes when they make little snide remarks about decisions I have made. Like giving up Harry Potter and Twilight because I believe it wasn't good for me. Now it's one thing after another, "Oh, I thought you couldn't watch Avatar because it's fantasy." But though we have different beliefs. I will always love them. And have faith that God will show them his true and pure love. The love that sent his son on the cross. The love that is the reason why I can stand here and say that I have a relationship with God. Not perfect. I am still learning and stumbling. But nonetheless, a relationship. Please keep me and my family in your prayers. They mean so much to me.
God Bless.
Age: 20
Purpose: To Vent?
Family. You love them. You leave them. You dislike them at moments. But they are always there. My family. Is CRAZY. That's right. Totally an completely insane. In a good way. However there is something that makes it hard for me to be a part of my family sometimes.
Beliefs. Oh, and faith.
Yes. I am going there.
I want to go to a school that could change my life forever. BUT, and this is a big BUT. My family doesn't think it's a good idea. Namely my mom, dad and older sister. Why? Because of their beliefs and their thoughts patterns. So right now. I am going to vent my frustrations about my family on my blog. Because I have to get it out. I tried but I feel like I need to write it fully and completely out.
My mom is a believer of God and believes that Christ died for our sins and is our savior. She believes that God can heal but has a religious spirit and fear working against her when it comes to me wanting to go to BSSM. She is also very much influenced by what people write about places that are complete and total lies. She went on Google and searched the school. And things that were written about it were less then impressive. Because people always have opinions and people don't understand the power of the Holy Spirit. So they call it a cult. And then she misread what the website said about the school thinking that it said that they give you powers. When they really help you grow in your faith and learn about the gifts that God has given you. And that is the religious thought. That it's a cult. When in reality it's the real, true, power of the Holy Spirit working. Satan doesn't like that. So things get said, and things get written and it's all a bunch of pooey. And then she has fear working through her. She doesn't want me to go because it is too far away and that she will never be able to see me. Total fear. But I need to grow. And take a step into the unknown.
My dad believes in God, and has had experiences where Jesus has literally saved him. But he also believes in reincarnation and different kinds of things from different religions. And he is influenced by my mom so whatever she thinks, he thinks. Because you know, they are married. And I guess you should agree on some things. But it would be nice if someone was on my side. Bleh. I love my dad, but sometimes...I don't know.
My older sister believes in God but doesn't believe that Jesus is our savior. Which was one of the hardest things for me to ever hear. Because I just couldn't imagine. And we have talked about it. And I have tried to argue. Which didn't get anywhere at all. And all that jazz. But she is also influenced by my mom so she doesn't want me to go either. She read the website and also misread it. Telling me that no school can give you powers, and that God is the only one who can give you gifts. Which I totally agree with but that isn't what the school is saying. And I love my older sister. But I don't know how to get across to her, but to just love. She told me she will never change her beliefs because she knows that it's the right thing. Which I respect her for. But I just worry.
And my younger sister is a teenager. And as a teenager she might believe in God and Jesus, but she won't say it because she wants to be cool. And according to teen law....if you are a Christian, you aren't cool. So she doesn't like me talking about God to her or around her because she likes her life and doesn't want to be convicted of her sins. So she puts me down about my faith saying I am acting all "holier then thou". When I am just trying to be a better me.
Then there is my grandma. I love her. And she believes in most everything I believe in but when someone tells her something she kind of gets swayed. SO when she hears negative things about what I am doing or what the youth group is doing or the school I want to go to. She thinks. And over thinks. And then maybe gets a negative mindset about it too. Even if it is all a lie. She tries not to take sides. But she doesn't want to step on anyones toes. And some day she will have to choose a side and not sit on the fence. Not that she needs to choose sides as in be on my side or theirs. But she has to know where she stands in her faith. Either all in or not in at all.
So there it is. My family. Their beliefs.
And my beliefs? I believe in my Papa God. And Jesus. And the Holy Spirit. And holy drunkenness. I believe in the baptism of fire and water. As in, the baptism of the Holy Spirit and water baptism. I believe that the lifestyle in the book of Acts in the Bible is the lifestyle we are supposed to live. Be proactive. Go and do. Not just sit and talk. And though I know that I am totally not the perfect Kingdom Citizen, I am doing what I can to better myself. And I just love God. I am head over heels in love with God. He is my provider and my father. He loves me with no contraints and treats me like a princess. He sets me up for sunsets to see and capture on camera. He does that for me. He calls me beautiful and lovely and his darling. And I love it. And my entire life, is no longer mine. It's not. I don't live for me. I live for God. And that's that.
So it's hard to be a part of a family that has different thoughts. Do I love them any less? No. Not one little bit. Because I do love them. I pray that they will come to the realization that life is more then what they think and that there is a God that is the God of all gods, the Lord of all lords who has the world in his hand. Who sent his son to die for our sins and to show us the lifestyle we are meant to live. I know it sounds like I was being kind of harsh about my family, it's just. Part of me doesn't know what to do. And the other part of me wants to just slap them in the face and tell them I am not stupid. I am not naiive about my Papa God. I am naiive about a lot of things. But when it comes to my relationship with God, I have learned to be wise. I am learning daily more and more about my Papa. And whatever he wants in my life I want.
So this is just me venting. It doesn't happen that often that I need to vent like this. But it had to happen eventually. I love my family. They mean the world to me. They are beautiful and loving people. Hilarious and silly. I don't know where I would be without my family. They have taught me so much. This one thing. However big it may be....has made it hard to be around them sometimes when they make little snide remarks about decisions I have made. Like giving up Harry Potter and Twilight because I believe it wasn't good for me. Now it's one thing after another, "Oh, I thought you couldn't watch Avatar because it's fantasy." But though we have different beliefs. I will always love them. And have faith that God will show them his true and pure love. The love that sent his son on the cross. The love that is the reason why I can stand here and say that I have a relationship with God. Not perfect. I am still learning and stumbling. But nonetheless, a relationship. Please keep me and my family in your prayers. They mean so much to me.
God Bless.
Saturday, May 8, 2010
God's Art.
Name: Kassy
Age: 20
Subject: Photography.
So there are so many different passions in my life, but one of them, one that I love the most above almost all of them. Is photography. It makes me happy. I just want to travel the world and capture God's Art. Like, I am not joking. I am completely serious. The world. Is so darn beautiful. All of the paintings God has created. It makes me all excited because I just love picking up my little Coolpix Nikon camera and doing point-and-click photos. Of the sky. Of the trees. Of the river. Of the rail-road tracks. Anything and everything. I love it. The one thing I love the most about God's Art.....the sky. It is SO wonderful. SO beautiful. Every little detail. Like the clouds. Oh the clouds. How I love them. How I just look up and they are put together in this beautiful design that is nothing....but is everything all at the same time. My heart almost skips a beat whenever I see the beauty that God put there. For us! Can you imagine?! He created this beautiful Earth...FOR US! Everything was put here for us to discover. Nightly he paints us a portrait. With purples and pinks and oranges and reds....all mixing together so delicately and so perfectly. I love it.
Oh and goodness. I would love to be a wedding photographer. Because that would be SO beautiful. I love weddings. They make me happy. Pure. Beautiful love. Lately I have seen some wonderful pictures from just stumbling through websites. And they make me want to be a wedding photographer. To have to ability to capture the timeless love. And I am given amazing ideas on how to place things and all that jazz. Love. It makes me happy as well.
Now. All I need is a big ol' camera to do the job. And then learn how to use it. All I have right now is my little itty bitty camera. Which I LOVE. But I want one that has removable lenses and a million times zoom. And just all the bells and whistles! I declare that upon my life. The perfect camera to make my dreams come true. And the funding the travel the world taking pictures of art and weddings. I DECLARE IT AND CLAIM IT AS MY OWN!!! PAPA!!! GLORY! I loves you.
God Bless.
Age: 20
Subject: Photography.
So there are so many different passions in my life, but one of them, one that I love the most above almost all of them. Is photography. It makes me happy. I just want to travel the world and capture God's Art. Like, I am not joking. I am completely serious. The world. Is so darn beautiful. All of the paintings God has created. It makes me all excited because I just love picking up my little Coolpix Nikon camera and doing point-and-click photos. Of the sky. Of the trees. Of the river. Of the rail-road tracks. Anything and everything. I love it. The one thing I love the most about God's Art.....the sky. It is SO wonderful. SO beautiful. Every little detail. Like the clouds. Oh the clouds. How I love them. How I just look up and they are put together in this beautiful design that is nothing....but is everything all at the same time. My heart almost skips a beat whenever I see the beauty that God put there. For us! Can you imagine?! He created this beautiful Earth...FOR US! Everything was put here for us to discover. Nightly he paints us a portrait. With purples and pinks and oranges and reds....all mixing together so delicately and so perfectly. I love it.
Oh and goodness. I would love to be a wedding photographer. Because that would be SO beautiful. I love weddings. They make me happy. Pure. Beautiful love. Lately I have seen some wonderful pictures from just stumbling through websites. And they make me want to be a wedding photographer. To have to ability to capture the timeless love. And I am given amazing ideas on how to place things and all that jazz. Love. It makes me happy as well.
Now. All I need is a big ol' camera to do the job. And then learn how to use it. All I have right now is my little itty bitty camera. Which I LOVE. But I want one that has removable lenses and a million times zoom. And just all the bells and whistles! I declare that upon my life. The perfect camera to make my dreams come true. And the funding the travel the world taking pictures of art and weddings. I DECLARE IT AND CLAIM IT AS MY OWN!!! PAPA!!! GLORY! I loves you.
God Bless.
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
Change Is Good. Right?
Name: Kassy
Age: 20
Subject: Change.
Have you ever realized in life how change is always the hardest thing? Like when you are a little kid and all you ever want is to just have friends and then your family moves. That change hurts. I have felt that hurt. I have experienced that. And now that I am an adult, it hasn't really changed all that much. I have an interview scheduled for BSSM May 28th @ 3pm. And it just hit me, that that means this is all real. That I didn't just apply to a school. I am now awaiting an interview to determine whether or not I am going to move away or not. Do I want to? Oh yeah. Will it hurt? More then you can even imagine.
Astoria. It's my home. The place I grew up. The place where I met all the people who now mean the world to me. My best friends. And my family. My entire life has been here. In this place. And just thinking about leaving...my heart aches. Because it would mean that I would have to experience that change once again. I know it's not a bad thing. It just isn't easy.
So many of the people I love still live here and will probably be here if and when I leave.
My family. My mom & dad. My sisters. And my Grandma. Wow. Leaving them behind will probably be the hardest thing I will ever have to do. They are my lifeline. We fought some crazy fights, got over addictions, and loved together. We started new lives and changed together. And my heart is always with them. I don't know if I will be able to say goodbye to them. I know I will cry many many tears, even after I am gone. My heart, might break just a little.
My friends. So very many of my favorite memories are with my friends. I am convinced that they are the reason I am standing here today. The reason I am who I am. They helped me through the roughest part of my life. And they still love me. There is one girl in particular who it might be the hardest to say goodbye to because I have had to say goodbye to her so many times before.
I have known her for most of my life living here in Astoria. She is probably one of the most beautiful women I know. Her heart for God shines through her. She isn't perfect, and she isn't around a lot. But I love her to pieces. She is my best friend. She has and always will be. No matter where we go in life, I know we will always be there for each other. We changed together. We helped each other. I have yelled at her. And she has just taken it. She has, I am sure, gotten upset at me more then a few times, but she still loves me just the same. It will be hard saying goodbye to her, because this time, it will be me leaving.
Riverpoint Youth. My greatest change happened in this place. My heart grew fond of my Papa God. I got over addictions and losses of childhood, and pain and heartaches in that place and with those people. They knew me at my lowest time in my life where I was ready to just give up on life. And they were my strength. I knew that the love I felt there the first time I ever went, was the love I had been looking for for so long. I changed the most there. I found God for real for the first time with those loving individuals who were there every step of the way. I honestly don't know where I would be or what I would be doing with my life if it wasn't for them. Leaving that place, although I know I will always be able to return, will be hard. They have been my support system for the past almost 2 years now. But I know you have to learn to stand on your own where you are leaning on God only.
So change is good right? And I know that all of this is just up in the air until I get accepted at the school. But this has been on my heart a lot. Leaving. Changing. And living. See the beauty and art of God in a completely new location where my photography will have to capture new images. I know that I am ready for a big life change. But it doesn't mean it won't hurt. Please keep me in your prayers. That Papa will provide me the funding to go to BSSM. I need provision in the name of Jesus!
God Bless.
Age: 20
Subject: Change.
Have you ever realized in life how change is always the hardest thing? Like when you are a little kid and all you ever want is to just have friends and then your family moves. That change hurts. I have felt that hurt. I have experienced that. And now that I am an adult, it hasn't really changed all that much. I have an interview scheduled for BSSM May 28th @ 3pm. And it just hit me, that that means this is all real. That I didn't just apply to a school. I am now awaiting an interview to determine whether or not I am going to move away or not. Do I want to? Oh yeah. Will it hurt? More then you can even imagine.
Astoria. It's my home. The place I grew up. The place where I met all the people who now mean the world to me. My best friends. And my family. My entire life has been here. In this place. And just thinking about leaving...my heart aches. Because it would mean that I would have to experience that change once again. I know it's not a bad thing. It just isn't easy.
So many of the people I love still live here and will probably be here if and when I leave.
My family. My mom & dad. My sisters. And my Grandma. Wow. Leaving them behind will probably be the hardest thing I will ever have to do. They are my lifeline. We fought some crazy fights, got over addictions, and loved together. We started new lives and changed together. And my heart is always with them. I don't know if I will be able to say goodbye to them. I know I will cry many many tears, even after I am gone. My heart, might break just a little.
My friends. So very many of my favorite memories are with my friends. I am convinced that they are the reason I am standing here today. The reason I am who I am. They helped me through the roughest part of my life. And they still love me. There is one girl in particular who it might be the hardest to say goodbye to because I have had to say goodbye to her so many times before.
I have known her for most of my life living here in Astoria. She is probably one of the most beautiful women I know. Her heart for God shines through her. She isn't perfect, and she isn't around a lot. But I love her to pieces. She is my best friend. She has and always will be. No matter where we go in life, I know we will always be there for each other. We changed together. We helped each other. I have yelled at her. And she has just taken it. She has, I am sure, gotten upset at me more then a few times, but she still loves me just the same. It will be hard saying goodbye to her, because this time, it will be me leaving.
Riverpoint Youth. My greatest change happened in this place. My heart grew fond of my Papa God. I got over addictions and losses of childhood, and pain and heartaches in that place and with those people. They knew me at my lowest time in my life where I was ready to just give up on life. And they were my strength. I knew that the love I felt there the first time I ever went, was the love I had been looking for for so long. I changed the most there. I found God for real for the first time with those loving individuals who were there every step of the way. I honestly don't know where I would be or what I would be doing with my life if it wasn't for them. Leaving that place, although I know I will always be able to return, will be hard. They have been my support system for the past almost 2 years now. But I know you have to learn to stand on your own where you are leaning on God only.
So change is good right? And I know that all of this is just up in the air until I get accepted at the school. But this has been on my heart a lot. Leaving. Changing. And living. See the beauty and art of God in a completely new location where my photography will have to capture new images. I know that I am ready for a big life change. But it doesn't mean it won't hurt. Please keep me in your prayers. That Papa will provide me the funding to go to BSSM. I need provision in the name of Jesus!
God Bless.
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